lyrics


oh thunder, 2010
1. Come Alive
2. The Whale
3. Scream
4. Trails of Star
5.
Hush (Smash!)
6. February 17th (instrumental)
7. Careful Broken
8. Street To Ride
9. When A Heart Becomes A Heart

Come Alive
The night rains sideways
Little darts sting my face
The wind leans like a falling wall
There is struggle to walk
but an ease to stand tall

The black sound rushes to rise
Catching shadows mad with a violence
The rain has set fire to everything

What does not rage,
rests on the pavement
Or sleeps in the leaves like a distant city
There is struggle to hide now
but an ease to come alive

Come Alive, come alive…

All the layers and layers
Cannot shield from revival
Mad with the dancing storm

And all the layers and layers
Refuse to disguise
The birth of the Winter Child
Fire tall and body alive
The birth of the Winter Child…

The Whale
From the eyes of the whale that follows me
I’m a child of my own
And my heart cries out for the miracle
Of my constant motion
Though I’m stuck on the road crying
And there’s no way home
From the eyes of the whale following
There’s the back of me
My child I see
Perfectly

From here there’s something waking, rising
Coming so far up to breathe
It could be a swelling wave
Or it could be a body surfacing

From the eyes of the one that’s struggling
I’ve abandoned all hope
From the eyes of the one from behind
There’s the back of my shoulders
And back of my face
And I cannot find one thing misplaced

Revealed in time so rare and chosen
It is, it is, it’s skin I see
A world awoke and keeps so much left hidden
The rest I imagine
From here there’s something waking, rising
Coming so far up to breathe
It could be a swelling wave
Or it could be a body surfacing
Revealed in time…
From here there’s something waking, rising…

Scream
Maybe I scared them off…
Maybe I scared them all off

I found my scream
Out in the woods
Brutal, sure, and terrifying
It roars, it falls, it enters
As it reappears

Tonight I found my scream
It sent the dear running
It got the rain hailing
Maybe I scared them off
Maybe I scared them all off

Oh Thunder, Thunder
Let me try to rip apart your storm
To find the Giant, Giant
Tell us what it is that keeps us home
Oh Body, Body
Let me understand the stray dog song
To find the brutal, sure, and –
brutal, sure, and –
Terrifying

I found my scream…
Maybe I scared them off…

Trails of Star
Trails of star
If you’re real
You’ll disappear

In the second dream
You reveal to me
From your own memory
What the first dream dreamt

You stayed in town
Didn’t want me to know

At the trails of star
Can you see it now?
Where the words you say
Are the things I saw

Phone call
If you’re real
You’ll disappear

In the second dream
You reveal to me
What I’m watching
Every trail of star

At the trails of star
Can you see it now?
Where the words you say
Are the things I saw…

Hush (Smash!)
So he said he’s been
Caught in a similar wave
He can’t sleep either
Even though winter
Wears a heavy lid
He gets out of bed and can’t see
Why here, why this,
Why why would I ever?
Even though leaves already fell
And the sprouts wait

And he suddenly
Craves to smash something
Even when everything sings,
Hush, hush, hush

We all, we all can’t wait, can’t wait
To smash something!
We all, we all can’t wait, can’t wait
To – to – t o –

So she said she’s been
Caught in a similar trance
She waits until
Night to tear off her
Clothes and run, run
And as the clouds begin to devour
She chooses to shriek
Even though cold offers her tears
It offers her tears

And she suddenly
Craves to smash something
Even when everything sings,
Hush, hush, hush

We all, we all can’t wait, can’t wait
To smash something!

Careful Broken
When I come home all I want
Is a quiet house
Well I came home, didn’t I?
Yea I came home, didn’t I?
Well it’s hard to tell
And define the smells
No longer passing

Oh I wish
I’d more be the Careful Broken
I could make the bed right away
I would make it seem like nobody
Knew these sheets

When I came home I could not see
I said, I’ll just touch everything
And I’ll make something mine
You will have me as yours
And I’ll know where I am
When I wake up

Oh I wish
I’d more be the Careful Broken
All the glasses would stand in the cupboard
But first I’d wash them clean
So nobody left a mark

See now
Now that I’m making the bed
Their seat can get cold
And time will remove
The body it knew

And I’m now the Careful Broken
I never leave the chair out and open
I put it away…

Street To Ride
Well if there’s one thing that I know
It’s that I love these streets
I could walk ‘em, run ‘em, ride ‘em
And I don’t think I’d get tired
Of all the houses have to say
Or all the different ways
The sun bleeds through

Well if there’s one thing that I’m knowin’
Solitude’s a heavy horse
On her back I keep on piling
All the different loads of crying
On her thigh I slap, with a spur I press
Go leave, my loneliness…

If there’s one thing that I know
It’s that I got a street to ride
With an ever-changing light
With a constant turning shadow

If there’s one thing that I know
It all takes a little pain
To climb the hill you stagger
To work the way desired
To live a life of truth
To find the one that proves
To bleed through

When A Heart Becomes A Heart
When the heart overfills
Then the heart comes a heart
Says, “I have nothing to say
Because there are too many words
There are too many words”
Then the body hears
And the body says
“Well I have so much to say
But I have no clue what it is
I have no clue what it is”

And the body goes,
Cry – no, no, no – run
No, speak, no, sing
No, huddle in the corner
Spread out in the grass
Or kiss him, or hold her
Or thank you, I’m sorry
For everything

But when the heart runs dry
It goes by another name
And says, “I have one thing to say
Faith is a dead end
Faith is a dead end”
And the body kind of looks
And the body looks away
And says, “Was there something I heard?
I can’t remember
I can’t remember”

And the body goes,
Sit and stare and cry
Please cry, but I can’t cry
Please cry, but I can’t cry

Then comes the honest minute
Of the quiet, dark hour
With the naked body
Of the shivering winter
She cannot find her room
In a stranger’s house
It leaves me struck
In an empty room weeping
I’m weeping

Well if this is a body
We stand with our chest faced towards the sky
With arms hanging down, head back
And our feet barely grab the ground
Our feet barely grab the ground…


little warrior, 2009
1. Red Spider, Red Star
2. The Fox
3. Little Warrior
4. Ghosts in the World
5. Teach Me
6. Cathedral

Red Spider, Red Star
red planet, red star
blinking from so far away
can you see me
can you hear me?
and the trees might turn to white
in the middle of the night
i can see the galaxies
in the sky and in the trees
you dabble into clusters
you’re not a single start
you take up the whole sky
blinking to my eye
red spider, red star
catching light in front of me
how do you build it?
a web suspended
and the wind might blow you down
for miles until there’s ground
i can see the galaxies
in the sky and in the trees
and the wind might blow you down
for miles until there’s ground
and the trees might turn to white
from catching so much light

The Fox
swim tall, through the pounding wave, little fox
dive low, when you hear them chains, little fox
run with hooves, take the horse, little fox
beat the earth, through your feet, with your heart
when the open mouths find you
with their eager teeth, fangs revealed
this is not love
they do not love
they are feeding on the beats of your heart
they will leave you starving and haunted
when they come knocking, howling for more
turn, turn, turn from them, run, run
turn, turn, turn from them, run, run
turn, turn, turn from them, run, run, run from them
turn, turn, turn from them, run!
i am not loved by you
i am fed upon by you

Little Warrior
oh, little warrior
so much water within you
you make up the tears not shed
in the thick-skinned world
let this one fall down
let this one fall
let this one fall down, let this one fall
with the same tears shed as those that stained cheeks
upon our arrival
oh, little warrior
your skin’s thick as a bowl is deep
with no fantastic wall
but thick with room to hold
help this one stand out, help this one up
to the ruling wall as a reminder
that they in turn do fall
let us return now, let us return
to the same tears shed as those that stained cheeks
upon our arrival
back to the water, back to the deep
without the ruling wall to find the place of
every arrival

Ghosts in the World
when we are ghosts in the world
we will find eachother’s arms
and there will be no rules
that is what our death will be
when i let go of my body
when i let go of my home
you won’t need to haunt me anymore
but now that i am living, now that i’m alive
i’m gonna withdraw from you, for you, for me
now that i am living, now that i’m alive
our desire is a whirlpool that pulls me from light
now that i am living, now that i’m alive
our desire is a whirlpool that takes me from life
so i’m gonna withdraw from you, for you, for me
when we’re dead and gone, we can build and build
what never worked here
without the strain or pain of being life and light
and watching it disappear
when we are ghosts in the world
i’ll find your house floating detached
and no one has to know
no one has to die
no one’s light will dim
because we will be ghosts in the world
we will ghosts in the world

Teach Me
teach me how to see the rain coming on
teach me how to bend my back for so long
have i heard a forest demon?
no, i learn it haunts no reason
down a few blocks, they raise peacocks
teach me how to greet a new babe’s wonder
teach me how to let my voice come sooner
the daybreak with her fog of claws
but she just wants her belly rubbed
she’s not afraid of me now
she plays on whats been plowed
teach me how to make the long row shorter
teach me how to make the warmth last longer
keep your eyes on what you plant
when the clouds part, lean back
make the seconds hours
with the sun and with the flowers

Cathedral
you take me to a cathedral
sit me down on the bench
you take down the stained-glass windows
they show the story of your birth
and you say, “Here, here I am born
There, there are the angels
Those, my mom and my dad
That, that is a weaver”
kaitlin, have i seen war?
did i ever ride horses?
was i a boy in a choir?
did i ever have a sister?
and you say, “Here, here you are born
There, there are the angels
Those, your mom and your dad
That, that is a sculptor”
you take me to a cathedral
didn’t answer my question
will i see space?
you might’ve told me
but i could not hear it
i was listening to the choir’s song
could not stop listening to the choir’s song

for cedar, 2008
1. Today
2. Julie
3. Walk Home
4. Joseph’s Song
5. River
6. Electric Sky
7. The Last Meal
8. All the World in Bloom
9. Healing
10. A Midwest Winter

Today
today, what beauty today found
in gold leaves, in loosening grip
on the reins of the wind, so that
the leaves can fly
i woke in a house of a friend
under blue blanket, with my heart pounding
but the first thing i saw
i saw was light
swirling with tornadoes downtown
i feel for ripe fruit at the market
drag home bags of heavy apples
though they were bruised
it took me three hours to get home
daylight savings lended me the time

Julie
ulia, take my guitar
rest your head on his shoulder
don’t be scared to let me go
i’ll learn to love what i can’t have
baby, light my wings with water
you’re more than desire
i only feel what i am now
julie, i can’t find jealousy
think i left it outside
it’s only that i saw that picture
who’d know that i’d feel love
maybe, maybe i might love him
either or i feel love
three babes asleep on the floor
all found their piece of the boards
nothing is mine, nothing’s his
i felt the night find the light
for this

Walk Home
black water stretch into black sky
from the bridge it’s a universe
on the edge of infinity
a blue sign reflecting
“the oysters here are prime”
with the arm of a boy and the boardwalk
i couldn’t really complain
the oil on the water
and a wavering jellyfish
looked like the death of a star
the sound of my feet on the pavement
i don’t want to ever get home
but i know once a block away
it’ll seem like i’m so far away
and home never looked so warm

Joseph’s Song
if you sail away today
i’ll pack my bags in the morning
if you saddle up this way
i’ll leave my town in the morning
if we bus for bumblebees
shine the boots of the geese
we’ll make the jingling sound
that means we got the means to travel on
once we ease on to the road
a goodbye been had, a goodbye been told
we’ll find the free and far
the flying birch knows where we are
no more bus or shine
no more work for dimes
no more feeling blue and there’s no more missing you
what use in having home
when heaven roasts at the reach of tongue
the road provides a change of eyes
let loose in what confines
we’ll ride the trucking earth
instead of standing in the surf
we’ll meet so many living things
instead of dwelling in our dreams
if you go i say i’ll go
and we’ll leave all this in the morning
the flies be picking at my mind
and the mold of the left behind
but now no more we’ll close the door
and look ahead until we’re dead
bye, bye we’re pushing ground
you tangerine, tangible town

River
hold my head in your hand
lift my lips onto these
spread my spine and align
so i can reach your eye
you think you gave a kiss
a gift of heat but
look how straight i sit
i see more than i did
i grazed your back with my hand
i called for all
they couldn’t fight for you
bu they’ll heal what hurts
river, wind and curve
current catch what you drop
if it falls into me
i will, i will, i will carry as i cry

Electric Sky
oh, electric sky
stain my eye blue every waft i get of you
oh, fallen leaves, you’re far from dead
ring my ears familiar as a mother’s breath
untie my mind, unravel a few secrets of this life
oh, sun i know you so well
i know a hundred ways you fall, float, shoot and seep through the air
oh, sun you know me so well
you know every strand of my hair
and still you leave me stunned to find
a little more than warmth
oh, wind that wanders the world
gathers the scents and sings
you are what bathes me
i know you how you know me
and i’ll never know you as well as i do now
and i’ll never know you as well as i did when a child
and i’ll never know you as well as i will when i die
oh, mossy tree that holds me
in this moment, your pulse is mine
oh, mossy tree that holds me
i love how old you are, how strong you are
how humble and silent you stand
with layers and layers of the stories of seasons
i am dying to know, but i’ll let it go

The Last Meal
tonight i’ll prepare for the last meal
the last whispered grace
my fingers will fold on the belly’s field
and i’ll hear every hair hit the hay
tonight i’ll take down the written wall
each line on the page, a nest in the paint
the letters will fold as the fire will burn
and i’ll hear every word crawl and faint
let the ground fill my back, let my spirit lift
thank my body, my noble steed
let the spiraling road lead me back to my home
lead the night into day, lead my death into birth
what i carved in caves
what i buried with bones
what i swallowed down whole
every thread that i’ve sewn
what i gathered from grace
what i made from mistakes
what i’ve thrown to the wind
every day that i’ve lived
will holy yet only bleach the dog’s hide
and i trust it’ll run from the heart
run, run, run

All The World In Bloom
all the world in bloom
i paint the well a pale, pale white
my hands are full of snow
if i let go, where would water fall
all the world in bloom
i can’t hold myself from you
quiet my heart
all the wood will soon burn up
lay the well with white
pound the cloud a brick of clay
pour the worry in
wash clean of the dry, dry spill
all the world in bloom
all the world the ghost of you
if i carried rain
do you think i could turn gold to green

Healing
mother, i’m hurting
mother, i’m hurt
mother, i don’t know what to do
mother, i’m storing
all of the pain
into the center of myself
so when the carver
chips at my skin
it’ll take him the longest to find where it is
mother, i’m healing
mother, i’m healed
mother, i found it right where i left it
mother, i’ll write it
mother, i’ll sing
mother, i’ll burn it right to my skin
it’ll give my the faith, the faith, that it’s there to find

Midwest Winter
i wrote you a letter and already you have it
even though i didn’t send it
i’m glad it’s in your hands
there’s a snowbed full of bare, oak branches
tangled by the bare, oak trees
in the middle of the country, the winter here is black and white
but there’s a blend of gold from the barking dogs
racing far to find – what – well, we can only guess
the lakefront folds the oldest colors
far more longer than the sea
belonging to its own sky where the universe is bleached
on top the shoreline, feel the gray is reaching farther
and the blue below is what i see when the morning breaks my dream
if my love gets chased by bounding, brightening dogs
and its footprints lose their mark by the morning fog
well this patch on the trail is snug with blinding light
and it’s somehow lit from the gray above, from the gray above